Jenny Mollen Responds to Criticism Over Essay and Son Photos
Writer and actor Jenny Mollen has addressed significant public backlash following an essay she published and subsequent social media posts concerning her relationship with her two sons. The controversy ignited last month after Mollen, 47, shared an essay on Substack titled “Please. Stay. I want you. I need you. Oh, God,” a lyric from Benson Boone’s song “Beautiful Things.” In the piece, Mollen explored the complexities of motherhood, particularly raising boys.
Essay Explores Motherhood and Anticipatory Grief
In her essay, Mollen reflected on the idea that she might prefer her sons to marry women with deceased mothers, framing it as a way to remain relevant and useful through comparison. She described the experience of raising boys as emotionally challenging, noting how they can build a parent up only to later cause distress. Mollen recounted her understanding of her husband Jason Biggs’s mother’s reaction to their engagement, interpreting it as a loss of her son.
Mollen also detailed the intense dependency of her children, describing how they once required her presence for even basic activities like using the bathroom and needing her to interpret the world for them each morning. She expressed a sense of impending loss as her sons grow and become more independent, referring to them as “baby remoras” and “emotional vampires.” The essay touched upon the unique grief associated with mothers of boys, a grief she called “anticipatory” and stemming from the initial worship and adoration children often show their mothers.
Son’s Teenage Interactions and Parental Concerns
Further in the essay, Mollen described her reaction to her eldest son texting a 12-year-old girl. She perceived the girl as “toxic,” noting her assertive behavior and advanced vocabulary, which left her son seemingly captivated. Mollen voiced her desire to intervene, concerned her son might get hurt, but her husband, Jason Biggs, encouraged allowing their son to learn from his own mistakes. Mollen acknowledged the objective correctness of this approach but emphasized a mother’s instinct to protect her child.
The essay concluded with Mollen reflecting on the present, where her sons still seek her comfort and assistance. She acknowledged the bittersweet awareness of living through “the longest goodbye of my life” and expressed a wish for at least one of her sons to be gay.
Social Media Posts Spark Further Outrage
The essay’s themes drew immediate criticism online, with many users labeling Mollen’s writing as “disturbing” and “unhinged.” The controversy intensified when Mollen later posted photos of herself embracing her 12-year-old son on a bed. The caption, which has since been deleted, read, “Your eldest son will be the most toxic guy you ever date.” This post deeply concerned many, with one commenter describing it as “creepy AF” despite having sons of a similar age.
Mollen Explains Her Perspective and Personal History
In response to the intense criticism, Mollen addressed the accusations directly. She stated that she was called a “child molester” for sharing the photo with her son. She explained the photo was taken after her son returned from a weekend away, and it highlighted the profound realization that children can thrive independently, a realization that challenges a parent’s sense of being their child’s entire world.
Mollen also drew parallels to her own childhood, recalling a strained relationship with her mother, who reportedly told her she “didn’t know how to be a mom anymore” when Mollen was 12. She described her frequent travel as an unaccompanied minor to visit her mother and the lasting impact of this maternal distance. Mollen concluded by expressing how motherhood has profoundly broken her, describing it as a form of vulnerability bordering on masochism.
